I'm Gonna be Fine...

I realized today that I am going to be fine. Thoughts still slip into my head every now and again but not as painful as it once was. Sure, my guy guy has a lot to do with that but also, I think I'm getting used to his decision. He decided he didn't want to be with me anymore. Yes, that hurt very much but you know, you can't make somebody love you. Although, I tried, you just can't. Today a friend told me she saw her, his new girlfriend. Although I didn't want to hear about it, she looked at me and said, "she isn't that pretty, Lisa. Not as pretty as you." That meant a lot. Yeah, I want him to be with someone less attractive, but that wasn't what made me smile. It was the fact that yet again, a friend stepped up for me. She gave me the little boost that I needed for the day. It made me feel good. And you know, she looked me in the eye, she wasn't lying. She meant what she said. I know he doesn't have that. I know he doesn't have people that care for him like I do. My range of friends reaches so far and wide that just about anywhere I go, I have someone there for me. Not just acquaintances either. True friends. People that value me as their friend, someone they can always come to for anything. Yeah, I still don't want to run into him because that will still hurt me, but I'm gonna be OK.

My guy guy calls me every night. He sends me sweet text messages. He just makes me smile just thinking about him. I haven't seen him since my New Years party. I'm going to his neck of the woods on Friday. I can't wait till then!! I just want to spend more time with him. The friends have decided on another ski trip in February. I asked my guy guy if he wanted to go with me. He said yes. That should be interesting. Of course, it all depends on next week. My interview. I still really hope I have a good interview. Although I'm happier with the situation here, I still need to get out to better myself. This place is just holding me back. A good thing is, I no longer look at it as running away from him. It's more like running towards a better me. Course, I'm not there yet! I don't have the job. So I don't really have anything to lose. Just do it, do it!!*hehehehe, "starsky and Hutch", love that movie*

I would love to be on Survivor too!! I think I could totally stir it there. Be a well known name when I came home. Not as bad as Jerri but I think I could be a memorable player!! Wouldn't that be cool!!! Anyway, that was kinda an afterthought. Oh well, at least it wasn't some sad ex boyfriend afterthought. Life is getting better, at least for the moment...