I don't think it does....

Another hard day. I don't know what made it so hard, but I don't think the pain goes away. I finished my book, "he just not that into you" and let me tell you, it hurt. I'm sure it's all true but it hurt to know that he really wasn't all that into me, and the things he said after the break up, spelled it out. I must have been just an experiment or a learning tool or something. I mean, he was five years younger than me. I don't know, whatever it was, I didn't know it. In the book it says a girl should never chase after a guy. If a guy wants you, he will go to extreme measures to be with you. A girl should just set back and wait for a guy to come running...

You know, in the beginning I thought that was a load of sh*t but when I started to think about the guys I chased, it never worked... The guys who asked me out, they stuck, one for a year and a half and the other for a year and four months. Maybe that theory is true but then I have to think if I will ever get asked out again. There was a two year span in between my last two meaningful relationships. That's scary. It's basically telling me I will not find someone until I am 27 years old. Oh well. I guess I'll survive, I mean, I'm surviving right now ain't I?!? OK, so it might be a puthetic surviving but I am.

You know, I had told my ex that maybe in five years we could run into eachother and try it again. What a crock. I have realized that I am not going to settle for someone who is really great to me, but cheated. I don't want to settle with someone who hurt me so bad and could most possibly hurt me again. I'm not going to freak out about not having someone. Yeah, I miss the companionship, I miss my friend who was with me damn near everyday for a year and four months. That's what I miss. I guess I just need to get over it, evidently he has......