I laughed today....

Things are looking up, I laughed today. I sang along with my radio (even though it was the Chris Cagle song, "I Breathe in, and Breathe Out") I even smiled. I can tally this in as the first good day in a while. It wasn't a 'satisfied with my life' day but it was good. I think my crying days are over, of course I don't wanna speak too soon, Christmas and New Years are around the corner.

I spoke to a friend today who is going through the same things I am. She was actually the girl who let me know that my boyfriend cheated. She also told me that he lied to me about the girl and the things that happened. You know, my first instinct was to run home and email him, asking why he lied, but you know what, I realized it doesn't matter. Everything after the fact doesn't matter. He did what he did, nothing can change that and nothing can ease my mind about it. She is having a rough time with her breakup too. She confessed to me that she wanted her man back, even after all the things he has done to her. She said she couldn't make it without him. I looked her in the eye and said, a very wise man told me, "You get who you deserve" she and I both deserve better. Our lying cheating men will get who they deserve, a lying cheating woman. I believe that too, with all my heart.

Although I'm not a religious person, I feel like God loves me. Or maybe it's just karma, I don't know for sure, but whatever it is, it feels good. My ex told me that someone hit his car in the parking lot where he works. Then, a week later, he hit a deer. He loves that car, it's probably his most prized possession. I believe in a way, God is punishing him for the way he treated me. God knows, because I tell him every night. Most nights I ask him to take away the pain and the hurt, other nights I ask for Him to bring him back to me. Last night I asked for help to move on. I think He helped me alittle and I think he frowns on people who cheat and hurt another. Maybe I'll start going to church.

I laughed today, I wanna laugh everyday. That's a big part of who I am. We put up the Christmas tree at work today, got it completely decorated and the tree stand broke and it toppled over. I laughed so hard. It felt good, no it felt GREAT!! I hope I laugh again tomorrow, and the next day, and the next... I hope I laugh for the rest of my life....