Another day down...

I have made it through another day with no tears. I will admit that I have entered the bitter stage. I did go see CARS last night with my friend, Roush Guy. This whole thing has brought me and him even closer since the 'other girl' was his ex girlfriend. We had talked about it when they started dating that if they ever broke up and me and pit guy ever broke up that his and mine would get together. We've said that from the get go. I guess his ex called him yesterday to ask why I was mad at her. Let me just say, RESPECT. When my ex-pit guy had a problem with me being friends with Roush Guy, we didn't hang out alone anymore. We still talked on the phone but I respected my boyfriend enough to not do something that made him feel uncomfortable. You do that when you love someone. Well, at least most of the people I associate with would.

But I guess I don't date those types.

Anywho....Cars was a great movie and several scenes with Dale Jr in them. It was totally totally cute!! It made me smile and laugh. It was funny because yesterday I went back and read the first couple postings of this blog. I was at a place I am right now but a whole lot worse. I know I loved Pit Guy more and I had him painted into my future with a cute little house and some dogs and maybe even a little one running around. But I think the key factor in this is I know the exact moment I fell out of love. It was last Monday when I found out he had spent time with this other girl and I got upset about it. That was when he said I was a horrible person and I didn't deserve any friends or to be treated any better than he treated me. At that moment my whole future painting evaporated and my heart let go. I know, I should have broken up with him that night and I did try to leave but I just thought he would apologize for it and say he didn't mean it. That never happened.

It's hard to keep loving someone when they think so lowly about you. I truely believe he meant and believed every word he said. I also believe that he thinks the same way about himself. I think that he knew he was in the wrong and he wanted me to feel as badly as him... mission accomplished. Little does he know, that was the defining moment in our relationship. That and when he said he was looking for someone else and when he finds her, I'm history. Who actually says that to their significant other???? I mean seriously..

Let me tell you though, he knew I loved him and he knew I would do anything for him. I still would have if he wouldn't have said those words to me. I will always love him in a way but I KNOW I deserve to be treated better. I am not the greatest girlfriend but if a guy treated me the same way I treated him, I would be satisfied.

My dream man would be someone like my father. If I could find someone half the man of my father I would be happy. I seriously think all the good ones are gone though. I guess that's probably why I haven't dated many people. I have had 3 serious boyfriends in my life. Yeah, just 3. I don't have a huge list and I tried to make each one work. This last one was the shortest at 11 months. The longest was a year and a half. I guess long term isn't for me. The other foot always drops.

If Mr. One Leg is out there, please come and find me!!!